It's one of those nights again.

i've been off my pills for about two weeks. finally got back on them today. unsure if it's me or the meds, but i feel like someone's watching me.

i still don't really know what to post on this site. i graduated recently, though.

Hey, welcome.

MAKE WAY! MAKE WAY FOR THE RAVEN KING!


I'm Maxwell, or Max- you can call me either.

male + 17 + infp-t + sagittarius

I plan to use this for writing stories/fic as well, but for now there's a lot of personal entries. I'll probably always make those kinds of entries on here, alongside stories and poetry.

 

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If you're

• racist
• homophobic                                                            
• transphobic                                                                                        
• lgbtphobic in general
• sexist

you can get off my journal, thanks.

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general cw for

• bugs
• paranoia
• medication
• anxiety
• depression

i'll try to keep the content warning list regularly updated. there will also be cws at the beginning of stories.

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> I just use kins to cope, and I'm doubles friendly, but I probably won't post about kins much here. Let me know if I should post a kin list!

 

I don't know what I'm doing here, honestly, so hopefully you can bear with me while I figure out how to navigate this site. <

 

> If you want to talk, feel free to shoot me a message :)

A recent poem I did. I don't have a title for this one, either.

 cw for vomit ment, bugs, gore (?), body horror, overall themes of apocalypse

=

the humans bit back their bile,
and the bugs choked on their own exoskeletons,
twitching,
crumpled,

and the deer drug themselves on broken limbs
to die in some peaceful corner as the world around them roared

the sun blotted out and the moon wept,
because the sun was her only friend

the ground shook and Disdain crawled from the cracks the Fear left
water became fire, and fire became mud,
and the ocean became thirsty,
and drank from the throats of those bared them

the stars danced and sang and cackled wickedly, because in reality
they had waited for this

a special kind of release

pangea watched as everything she created was destroyed, over and over, and she said nothing.

+++

i feel like this one is lacking in some ways, but i can't put my finger on it. is it too dramatic, too vague? does it sound too edgy? i can't really decide, but i think some of the imagery came out okay. i'm torn on the last line; i wanted to write "she wept", but i wanted to give her this air of disconnect from this situation. like, everyone is screaming and the whole rest of the poem is supposed to feel loud, but pangea is supposed to feel quiet. disconnect isn't the right word either. anyways, since i didn't end up using "wept" at the end of the final line, i put it in the moon line instead, which was originally supposed to say sobbed. i think i might rework this one over time.

(no subject)

 just went and looked back at some of the old poetry i posted on here. i don't like most of them anymore but ooooh, the teeth one. i still like that one. it just hits different, you feel? i think i achieved some sort of creepy feeling there, which is something i have a lot of trouble writing, though i really like to. next i want to write a poem about summer, and i want to find a way to use the word sticky. or maybe something that sounds like sticky. slick? i want to really hone in on the feeling of sweating.